What should I feel?

This is the first week of our final year of medicine. yup, final year! we're the final year medical students! a year to go to our professional exam, a year to graduating, a year to starting our career, a year to freedom? a year to the beginning of a torture?

i dunno what to feel

happy that I've gotten this far?
happy that it wont be long that I'll leave college?
happy that I'll start working and earning and living my dreams soon?
happy that I can make myself and my family proud?

or

nervous that the workload of our study will increase significantly?
stressed that lecturers are gonna have high expectations of us since we're the final year students?
scared to face the super massive tough FINAL professional exam?
sad that I'll leave the fun and joy of a student life?
worried about the huge huge burden of our work as houseman once we start working?

or sometimes, it kinda feels unbelievable too. or surprised that time flies soooo fast. and sometimes my fear and worries grow so big that it really freaks me out, and I want to run away from all the pressure and stress. on a second thought, I can't live without medicine, I cant imagine how its like not knowing about medicine, and if I could turn back time, I wouldnt change anything about my life except scold myself for procrastinating too much XD.

yup, its all a cocktail of feelings for me.

anyways, what I'd do now is savor the freedom we're having for these first 2 weeks. then I'll go from there.